I believe political races have morphed into more of giant ad campaigns than debates on how our country should be run.

I also fear that many people are ignoring their obligation to know the facts before casting their vote; it seems voting, for many, is as simple as painting by numbers. If the candidate has a “D” (or “R”) after their name, punch the ballot.

I speak from personal experience and about 50 yeas of studying candidates, with an added 6 years of writing occasional articles on specific candidates or races.

With that being said I readily admit that I am no expert. I do have opinions and fears, but don’t we all?

I don’t know if the “downhill slide” of politics began when Maxine Waters encouraged her followers to harass Republicans in restaurants and other public places, “When they were relaxing with their families” and nobody condemned her for saying it. The deterioration had probably begun long before Maxine’s tirade, but her words certainly did make a bad situation worse.

My family, siblings and parents, weren’t very political. We did have some discussions at the kitchen table and other venues around election time. They were more “fact finding” discussions than debates.

I awoke, politically, when I was in my early 20’s or late teens. Jimmy Carter was the first politician I strongly disagreed with. I often voiced my opinion that if a Russian task force was spotted enroute to America and intelligence had confirmed they carried nuclear weapons, Carter would probably hold a straw poll to determine the most acceptable action.

The thing that was so different then was that I had friends who supported Carter, and we would have lunch and some beers discussing our opinions without yelling, or “unfriending” anyone.

In the family I raised, I did not push my agenda on my children, but I did let them know where I stood when the subject would come up.

Fast forward to 2015-16. My kids were grown and many lived out of the house. I had written some pro-Trump views on Facebook before I realized a daughter living in Chicago was offended because she was strongly behind Hillary. I know my children, and I figured she, and one of my boys, were probably going to vote that way. I respected that and, I guess naively, I expected them to respect my right to have my own opinion. It wasn’t the first time I was wrong as a parent, but it was definitely the most “off base” I have been.

When Trump won, that daughter posted, “I don’t know what I’ll do!” I was concerned about just how upset she was. I called her immediately and she said she was OK but needed to talk to me. We decided I would drive out to the city and buy her breakfast the next morning.

I enjoyed the breakfast with no political discussion. As we were finishing, she asked why I voted for Trump and not “The female candidate.” I explained that Clinton’s gender had nothing to do with my decision and voiced that I was disappointed that my daughter would ask such a question. I pointed out that in all the time she has known me there has not been one time that I have minimized the value of females.

I decided to defend my position by naming reasons I thought Donald Trump would be better for America than Hillary would have been. I started out with how disappointed I was in the way she handled Benghazi, listing details of the failure there.

While I spoke, I was watching for hostile reactions. I saw her facial expressions change to anger and stopped talking.

She took a deep breath and questioned, “Is that all? She made one mistake in four years, so you refuse to vote for her?”

I knew I was heading downhill quickly. I had walked into her trap, and she was preparing to spring it. What are my options? Stop talking and attempt a graceful retreat? Name some of the other reasons I questioned Hillary’s ability to serve, and hope my daughter was mature enough to accept this difference of opinion as just that, rather than a failure in parenting.

I knew I was doomed. I was sitting in a diner in Chicago, a block from my daughter’s apartment. Deep in the deepest blue part of the blue state I live in, and my daughter had insisted I defend my decision to vote Republican, out loud, in a crowded restaurant! I quietly prayed this discussion would not be overheard!

She was through with me. Our relationship has not recovered! I have only seen her a few times in the 8 years since the first Trump victory. Our family is mostly conservative. We have eliminated all political talk when the liberal daughter attends a party, which is a rare occurrence.

After our “incident” I called several times and she didn’t answer _DARN THAT CALLER ID! I text every week or so and she responds if she feels like it- about one response per 4 or 5 texts.

This child, our fifth of seven children, used to be daddy’s girl. She attended Sunday mass with me when the rest of the family chose not to. When I went on errands or asked if anyone was interested in taking a ride with me, she was up for it. I was invited to all of the plays and choral programs she performed in while she was in high school and college. And then, sometime when she was away at school- she drank the cool aid!

The day after Trump’s second victory my ex-wife let me know that our daughter had called her and queried,  “Who did you vote for?” The phone was disconnected as soon as my ex answered, “Trump.”

I received the same call a short time later. I gave the same response and I was hung up on in the same way.

My daughter’s nieces’ and nephews’ who once gave her great joy have been blocked, dropped and whatever else means “cut-off” in the same way my entire family, my wife’s family, my wife and I have been removed from her life.

It’s sad that, as Christmas approaches, my daughter won’t have a family with her. We still love her and, I feel, she still loves us, but, somehow, she can’t bring herself to hear our side.

Who knows when this craziness happened. I guess it doesn’t matter.

I know I’m not the only one going through it. Some friends have shared similar stories with me. I have heard more on radio talk shows.

My thoughts on this craziness are, when you have no decent argument, you resort to emotional blackmail. What confuses me is- If they can’t defend their position, why don’t they change positions?

Thanks for reading this. Please comment, let me know if you agree, disagree, or have other feelings or comments!