Can Memory Loss Be An Effective Weight Loss Tool?

In January I was about to take a shower and glanced in the mirror, which unfortunately hadn’t steamed up yet.

Who is that man staring back at me? His face looks like mine. His bald head looks very familiar. But that gut? What happened to that skinny high school kid I used to be? Unfortunately there was a scale nearby and I forced that overweight, current me, to stand on it. Two hundred and twenty pounds! AAAaaaahhhhhh- I could go on, but I think that’s enough to show that I was not pleased.

I’m about 6 feet tall and in pretty good shape except for the growth I mentioned in the previous paragraph. I arbitrarily decided that about one ninety would be my ideal weight.

I wasn’t sure what behavior I should change. I have been skinny my whole life and didn’t want to go from forcing myself to eat to try to bulk up (Which I was actually doing until I saw how successful I had been) to some starvation diet. I chose to limit my portions at meals, continue to work out regularly and try to increase my aerobics. I wondered if that would be enough.

The basement needed a deep cleaning in the worst way so I went downstairs. I forgot to put shoes on and the basement floor was cold. I had to run back up to my second floor bedroom and get my gym shoes. In my bedroom I scratched my head and pondered, why did I just come upstairs? Once my feet hit the cold basement floor my memory was jarred. I went back upstairs and put shoes on. Back in the basement I moved a few things and realized I would need a broom and a wash bucket. I went to the first floor laundry room and got the wash bucket, but not the broom that was right next to it. Swearing to myself I returned to the laundry room and located the broom and dust pan. I started to sweep the ceiling (I did say thorough cleaning) and realized that I was dropping a lot of dust, dirt and occasional bugs on my head. I went up and get a hat. On the way up I decided to stop in the kitchen and make some coffee. The counter was dirty so I cleaned it. I went back downstairs without coffee or a hat. Another trip upstairs.

I did get the basement cleaned, eventually.

This summary is not an unusual day. I’m embarrassed to say it was typical. The only good thing about these memory lapses is I can’t remember exactly how often they happen. 

Well we are in July now and I realize that I forgot to start the aerobic routine. How could I have wasted those six months? I checked the scale to see how big a failure I had been. 

This has got to be a mistake! How did I lose seventeen pounds? I now weigh two hundred and three pounds!

Maybe the two story house wasn’t a bad idea. My ex-wife and I had some deep discussions about the benefits of a ranch verses a two story. Among the downside for the two story house was the constant up and down on the stairs. I’m starting to think maybe that was an upside. I’m also starting to think of ways I might be able to market my new weight loss discovery. “Memory/Weight Loss Combo Program” “A Stairway to a Better You” “The Basement to the Top Floor While Leaving Your Weight on the Stairs” “If I could remember where I left my weight I wouldn’t go back for it.” Aw, the ideas are just getting longer, not better.

It seems to me that I’m too hard on myself when I walk into a room and have no clue why I made the journey. By my calculations I’m only about twenty trips downstairs from a size 32 waist.

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Thanks, Phil